+ 'its summer solstice today', craig ferguson informs, 'thats right, today is the longest day of the year and also the shortest night. coincidence? even although its the shortest night of the year and you are watching this show, i'll lengthen it for you, it will feel longer. i know its short but it will feel longer once i get started... i've said that before... here in l.a. we are celebrating summer solstice by having a parade for the world champion l.a. lakers. the laker parade has a lot in common with the traditional pagan ceremony from the solstice. there will be drinking, and dancing, and sacrificing the virgins by throwing them into the mouth of our pagan god: jack nickelson. you know whats always involved with summer solstice? stonehenge. experts say stonehenge might have been a huge prehistoric calender. because today the heal stone aligns with the rays of the sun. and the druids carved sexy firemen into each of the twelve ring stones. other people say stonehenge was built to attract ufo's. which, if its true, is possibly the reason aliens have never come back. if you are aliens and you travel over millions of miles of galaxy, you travel through space, you arent going to be that impressed by stonehenge, are you? 'we have a space ship powered by anti matter, what do you have?' 'well, we've got this lovely henge. look at that, a lovely circle of stones all standing up-ooh!' 'lets get out of here, these people are morons!'.'
- maria bello
- d j qualls

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