6-10-10

+ 'researchers still dont know the purpose of sleep', craig ferguson says, 'its one of life's great mysteries. like why do men have nipples? i know why... i have to admit i dont get much sleep lately. not with the new twilight movie coming out. i'm like 'will bella choose edward or jacob? i dont know what i just said... i never really appreciated sleep until i had a little one in the house- boy that midget keeps me up at night! no, i'm talking about when you have a baby in the house. sleep researchers say that when you have a baby you loose 700 hours of sleep in the first year. but its worth it when they get big enough to do the yard work. which is usually about six months... according to research, older people need less sleep. i dont know why. i think its because you dont need a lot of energy to play bingo. do you know that americans spend 600 million dollars a year on sleep aids. and by that i mean pills. i am a little nervous taking pills, and coming from me, thats a big thing to say! i dont take pills, except for the pills that are advertised on cbs- they are awesome! and in no way habit forming... the sleep aid i use most is usually something along the lines of self massage. cbs doesnt advertise any products for that, unless you count the sham-wow, of course. i tried counting sheep at night but that doesnt work- i get too turned on! their little hooves, their come hither fleece, the way the taunt me whispering in my ear saying 'craig, youve been very baaaad'. back in my drinking days it was easy to get to sleep, you knock back a couple bottles of vodka and right to sleep. i never had a problem with the bed wetting because, for the most part, i enjoyed it. wake up to a little pond. the vodka really did the trick for me, i'd sleep like a log. sometimes id wake up in one of those too...'

+ jim parsons stops by to help with tweets and emails

-> wolfgang puck craig even wears safty goggles?