+ 'theres a big movie opening today and i'm very excited about it', craig ferguson tells, 'its yogi bear! yogi bear opens, you know what that means? oscar season! i was looking forward to yogi bear but then i saw the trailor. its very scary! they turned him into a modern bear. i'm not sure, i like the old cartoon. you know, 'a tiskit a taskit, a picanic basket!' which i admit probably isnt the best rhyme i've ever heard, but its not bad for a bear. not only does the bear speak, but he understands the basic meter of poetry! so what if taskit isnt a real word, what you rather him say? 'a corn dog a cheeto, wheres my burrito?' theres my poem. anyway, i think this yogi bear movie is dangerously misleading. bears dont walk on their hind legs like yogi, you know when he goes after picnic baskets. its true bears can stand on their hind legs for short periods, but they eat their food on all fours. they are like david hassellhoff. now i can hear some of you asking 'craig, are you an idiot?' yes, i am, i make that clear hear night after night. and yes, i take life lessons from cartoons. once when i was younger i wanted to go somewhere so i put on roller skates and strapped an acme rocket to my ass. i didnt get anywhere but it was the best damn three minutes of my life! yogi bear is just pro bear propaganda. the makers behind the movie dont want you to know the truth: bears are not our friends! yes, bears are sharks of the forest. actually, bears are worse then sharks. if a shark attacked you its because it thought you were something else like a seal or a sandwich. but a bear will attack you just for the fun of it! or at least they do at the clubs i go to...'

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