+ 'last night i was nominated for a grammy!' criag ferguson exclaims, 'it was for my audiobook of my biography. l l cool j told me i was nominated, and i was thinking 'man, this night couldnt get better!' but then it did! there was a live satellite hook-up with justin bieber. the young girls were screaming so much they shattered something very valuable: cher's face! last night i was talking to these journalists and they were saying 'justin is an internet sensation!' and i'm thinking 'oh really? is that a big deal?' you can be an internet sensation if you can auto tune your farts or if you can get drunk and eat a burger off the floor you are an internet sensation!'
- cedric the entertainer
+ chris hardwicke stops by to help with the tweets and emails and gets a 'team secretariat' shirt!
= norah jones

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