4-15-13

+ 'good evening, tonights show will be a little different', craig begins.  in the wake of the tragedy in boston, craig starts the show seated from his desk.  'obviously, the news of the today is so horrendous that it would seem insensitive at best to say 'its a great day for america' so i wont be starting the show with that tonight.  is anyone else sick of this shit?  i seem to have to say that too often, i have to not say its a great day for america, because of some random act of madness or terrorism.  anyway, the trouble is, of course, by the time you get to this show, you know, twelve thirty in your region or whatever.  by the time you get to this show, the media has been pouring over the events of the day, there has been constant analysis, speculation of the assumptions and stuff.  i'm not going to to do that, people say to me 'craig, your job is to make people laugh at the end of the day.'  and i think yes, thats true, but i've never professed to be any damn good at that, and the thing is, people want their minds taken off it.  and i think, ok, if you want your mind taken off it, watch a cartoon or a video or something.  i understand it, its perfectly acceptable, i dont think its a terrible thing to not want to think about it.  but i cant not think about it.  the deal i made with you when i started this show is that i will be as honest as i can be.  so i have to be honest, we will do the best show we can do, we will have some laughs, we'll do what we do to a degree, but this is on my mind.  i cant pretend its not there.  i'm not one of those people, i'm not a valuable quality entertainer.  and also, i have a personal connection with the city of boston.  i have family there, and when i became an american citizen in 2008, i spoke at phanial hall on july 4th at the invitation of tommy menino, who is the mayor of boston.  i've been there on the 4th of july many times, every cop in boston looks like i'm his brother!  my first stand up special in america i shot it in boston.  i'm used to and i love that town.  i'm applauded by this thing, when i watch it on these streets that i know, you watch the media go over and over this thing and its horrifying.  people say 'oh, you cant let the terrorists win'.  they're not fucking winning, its just there.  i know people say we dont know if its a terrorist.  yes we do, yes we do.  who ever did that thing wasnt doing it for any other reason, clearly they failed in achieving the number of dead or carnage that they were trying to get.  this wasnt some brave commando who broke in to a military instillation and put a mine on the side of a battleship and then snuck out fearing for his own life.  this was some fucking shithead that went into a public place and left something there that he knew was going to blow up.  thats not a soldier, thats a terrorist.  if i have all this inside of me, if i have all this rage and anger and distress inside of me, i'm not that good of a comedian to hide that from you.  i cant hide it from you, its there.  we will have our guests out tonight and i'll ask them about their lives!  i dont know how its going to be, luckily we have some great guests, so we have a shot.  they are cleaver and experienced men, so i think we will be alright.'
- rob lowe
* larry king