+ 'today is the busiest shipping day of the year', craig ferguson shares, 'its the run up to christamas, the shipping company is doing twice as many shipments as normal. so today would probably be the best day to send your drugs through the mail without getting caught... today fed ex processed more than 17 million shipments, ups delivered 11 million parcels, and the us postal service handled the most important package of all: mine! its heavy and it needs a lot of stamps... i used to collect stamps, not postage stamps- tramp stamps! i started down there and they go all the way up. i had to stop when they reached the base of my neck. not really. anyway, with all the packages going out there are bound to be some ending up at the wrong address. it happens to me occasionally. i have to go to my neighbors house and say 'here is your sports illustrated' magazine, and then he says 'here's your ferret monthly magazine'. a lot of packages this time of year get lost. thats awful, you are promised something great and then nothing ever happens. its like voting for obama!'
- dj qualls
-> cat cora