+ 'it is perhaps the greatest day ever!' craig ferguson suggests, 'because it is day two of geoff peterson and the bone patrol band! but more than that, it is a great day for two american icons: the ruler of hawaii, tom selleck, and the ruler of the rest of the world: oprah winfrey! happy birthday! now, tom selleck and oprah winfrey are very different of course, one is a rough and tumble sex pot who enjoys a bushy mustache, and the othe one is tom selleck! oh come on, steadman has a mustache! i always think its got to be tough for steadman, at christmas he buys her a nice robe, and she buys him france. 'great, another country. thanks, oprah'. what do you buy oprah winfrey for her birthday? she's got everything. what do you buy a woman who has everything apart from a successful television network...? its a joke, i love oprah. i really respect oprah, she's from a tough background. her story is an amazing american story. she started dirt poor in the south and she went on to help millions. she was her generation's honey boo boo!'
- simon helberg
> maria bamford