+ 'you know what i did today?' craig ferguson asks, 'i got a flu shot. i get one every year, thats how i roll. its a good idea to get a flu shot right now because we are officially entering cold and flu season. cold and flu season is especially problematic here in hollywood because its also oscar season! the oscar season means one thing: ass kissing- and that leads directly to influenza! so remember this, hollywood people, when you are kissing someone's ass, you are also kissing the ass of everyone else who's ass they have already kissed. its the circle of ass kissing. doctors say that now is the best time to get a flu shot because it takes a couple weeks to get working, and you want it working before thanksgiving. cause thats when everyone travels, people get on airplanes, they spread germs all over the country faster than tabloids spread rumors about me and katie curic...'
- tom hanks
> phil hanley