+ 'its a very historic today today', craig ferguson shares, 'it was this day in 1781, it was a great day for me but it was a little before i was born.  this was the day in 1781 that we discovered uranus.  so i would like to wish your anus a happy birthday!  course, today isnt actually the planet's birthday, its been around a long time before any of us saw it, but today is the anniversary of the day sir william herschel first observed it.  herschel was a british astronomer and he was looking through his telescope one night and he said 'i say, what an unearthly beauty, hence forth it shall be called 'uranus'.'  then he turned his telescope away from his neighbor's window and looked into the sky...  herschal eventually cataloged the position of over 800 stars, of course if you want to see stars in these positions now, you just watch the celebrity sex tapes.  i dont think the planet uranus would be a great place to visit though.  it shines very brightly but its icy cold and pale white and very distant.  its like gwyneth paltrow.'
- jason segel
- jennette mccurdy

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