+ 'i confess i'm not really feeling myself today', craig ferguson admits, 'i'm a big jumpy and scratchy. i went to the doctor and he did some tests. it didnt take long to get my results. he told me i have an acute case of royal wedding fever! its exactly one month from now when brittan's prince william and his lovely fiancee keke wigglesworth get married. over the weekend prince william had his stag night in a secret mansion. a stag night is the british version of a bachelor party. you know, a bachelor party has many different names: stag night, boys night out, weenie roast, brodeo, exhibit A for the prosecution... i heard that william's bachelor party got pretty crazy, at one point he knocked back a glass of chery and didnt stick out his pinky! apparently a stripper at the party sat on willam's lap and said 'ive been a very bad girl', and he sent her to the tower of london and had her beheaded! it must be awkward for prince william to get a lap dance from a stripper because british money that he slips into the stripper's g-string has a picture of his grandmother on it! thats got to be a little awkward! that cant be, you know, 'good for the wood'!'

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