3-03-11

+ 'i saw something very interesting today on the internet', craig ferguson admits, 'on msnbc's website it said that some luxury hotels are renting rooms by the hour. isnt that interesting? finally a place to go in the middle of the afternoon for a little 'room service'! and by room service i mean knockin' the boots, pullin' the jaffe, you know, poachin' the eggs, bobbing the saget. i think you know what i'm saying! 'craig, are you talking about sex?' yes i am! according to the article, swanky hotels in new york and l.a. have started renting out rooms for a few hours during the day. the hotels say it isnt just for couples, its for tired shoppers who just want to get off their feet for a couple hours. tired shoppers, eh? sure, and vasiline is for dry hands... i think this is for couples, this thing, and not for couples that are living with each other. this isnt for couples who are like 'we live in the same house, but lets go to a hotel for the afternoon', this is for affairs! its so you dont have to go out and rendezvous with french people, and do your thing in a sleazy motel. its so you dont have to go to a sleazy motel, or a car, or a dumpster behind the supermarket. well, not everyone likes to have their ass covered in used coffee grounds. besides me, of course. call me, juan valdez.'

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