+ 'actually, its not such a great day today if you have to buy gasoline', craig ferguson states, 'and some of us do! record high gas prices lately. the high gas prices is terrible and its an election year so both sides are trying to turn it into a political issue. the republicans are blaming comrade obama, and the democrats are saying it was that cowboy bush. i'm like, calm down everybody, do what i do with the gas situation, blame the dog... anyway, the obama administration is blaming the gas prices on unrest in the middle east. i think thats smart, because how long can violent chaos last in the middle east? its bound to clear up any day! here in l.a. gas prices have gone up so much i might have to go back to huffing paint. i go to the gas station everyday, not to fill up the tank, i just like to drizzle myself with the water from the squeegees! i understand that oil is a part of the american way of life: driving the open road, eating apple pie, getting it on under a snuggie. and petroleum products make all that possible. gasoline in our cars, natural gas in our ovens, vasoline under our... oh, nevermind. personally, i am always on the look out for a more cost effective way to commute. i'm always looking for an excuse to rollerblade!'
- malin akerman
* jon ronson