+ 'you know what happened in florida?' craig ferguson asks, 'a three year old boy showed up at preschool with 20 ounces of pot! i know! the florida school board was outraged, but the boy's teacher was like 'hey, it beat the hell out of an apple'. do you remember christin odonnell, the deleware woman who is running for the senate, she believes that masturbation should be outlawed, it turns out that she also doesnt believe in evolution. she asked the question, and i quote, 'why arent monkeys still evolving into humans?' it doesnt happen that fast. its not like nascar. its a little slower. and also monkeys are not turning into humans because they are too busy masturbating! do you know in kansas a delivery truck carrying ten thousand snack cakes was stolen. police are looking for that three year old boy from florida... hey hey! that was a joke right there!'
- david boreanaz (yes, they did actually kiss...)

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