+ 'this weekend is a very big one in hollywood, its the first big award show of the year', craig ferguson states, 'the ceremony where the world gathers to honor those who have made us laugh, who have made us cry, who has helped us masturbate. its the porno awards this weekend! i shouldnt call them the porno awards. porno is a derogatory term, it implies a negative value judgement. the proper word in erotica. anyway, this weekend's show is called the avn awards because they are sponsored by the adult video news. thats the adult industry's paper of record. its like newsweek for guys in trench coats. it would be great to be a reporter for the adult video news, that would be great! 'this just in... and out... and in again!'.'
- larry the cable guy
= 3 doors down