+ 'today is eleven eleven eleven', craig ferguson informs, 'todays date is the number eleven repeated three times. whats that called again when something is repeated over and over again? thats right, this show! the date 11/11/11 is kind of freaky though. seeing all these ones lined up like that reminds me of the days i had to count my earnings from the strip club. i may have been payed in one dollar bills, but what i learned there was priceless! on the internet there were all kinds of doomsday predictions for the eleventh. but guess what? nothing happened! it doesnt mean anything! people put a lot of significance in numbers, and these people are called morons! to me, numbers have no significance. mathematics has significance, but numbers are just tools of mathematics. i like mathematics, there's always a right or wrong answer. there's no subtlety, no nuance. unlike in art or literature or the gender of the prostitutes on hollywood boulevard! all i'm saying is that you know what you are going to get with mathematics, there's no nasty surprises... or awesome surprises depending on your point of view.'
+ jennifer tilly reads linda cunningham's 'small town girl'