+ happy halloween! 'it is a great day for the human race!' criag ferguson states, 'is it? yes it is. we are no seven billion strong! well done, us! the seven billionth person was born today. congratulations! its a baby girl! i think. you know whats more surprising? out of the seven billion people in the world no one is surprised that kim kardashian is getting divorced. thats not true, i was surprised. when i heard she was getting divorced i thought 'what?' i mean, i called it, but i didnt call it that fast- i said like a year, but thats fast! terribly sad. if two celebrities who hardly know each other get married for a tv show cant make it, what hope is there for any of us? apparently kim and her husband whose name is... i dont know, tall dude? what is it, lurch? i dont know. anyway, they didnt have a prenup! yeah, that will scare you on halloween! under california law that means that he is now legally entitled to half the junk in her trunk. thats still a lot of junk...'
* neil gaiman he presents craig with a haggis!

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