11-03-11

+ 'i usually try to avoid talking about controversial subjects', craig ferguson states, 'you know, like political dirty laundry and all that stuff. but the top story is pretty much everywhere right now so i've got to talk about it: thats right, someone bought queen victoria's underwear. apparently an anonymous man, a man that nobody knows who it is. 'what kind of man is that?' an anonymous man! he or she, but it was a man, but he was anonymous, so you cant be entirely sure. this anonymous person, a man, in scotland paid fifteen thousand bucks at auction for the panties from the 19th century. i cant tell you who it was, but it was a very tense auction. 'sold to the creepy scottish guy in the back!' cost me a fortune! but so what, i love the feeling of two hundred year old silk against my junk! beneath these trousers is a piece of history... and the queen's panties. the queen's undergarments were very big, they had to be: victoria was the embodiment of english modesty. she also had to cover up her tramp stamp as well.'

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