+ 'its not a great day for kim kardashian', craig ferguson shares, 'its not a great day for kim and her soon to be ex husband, lurch kardashian. as the whole world knows by now, they have pulled the plug on their marriage after a whopping 72 days. even by hollywood standards thats not long! i've had erections that have lasted longer! i know, i know, i should have called my doctor. but what am i going to say? 'its awesome, doctor!' i dont know why people get worked up about gay marriage, its not gay people who are ruining the sanctity of marriage, its fucking celebrities that are ruining the sanctity of marriage! 'craig, thats rich coming from you who has been married three times' shut up, i cant be held to my own standards, how dare you! i'll tell you, the news about the kardashian divorce has depressed me. its either that or all the candy i ate last night. and this morning. and right before i walked out right here... oh butterfinger, i am your bitch! anyway, the 72 day marriage doesn't come close to the all time hollywood record. thats held by carmen electra and dennis rodman who were married for 9 days. 9 days. it boggles my mind! what could dennis rodman have done? oh thats right, its dennis rodman.'

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