9-21-11

+ 'you see the x-factor earlier tonight?' craig ferguson asks, 'its the x-factor, the new singing competition show with simon cowell and paula abdul.  who says theres no original ideas in television?  i havent seen it, but i've got it on the tivo so down tell me what paula abdul says.  seriously, dont tell me because i woulnt be able to understand it.  now the expression 'the x factor' refers to the unexplainable quality that makes someone special. the french would call it, for example, 'gene se qua'.  the germans call it 'der poopin sphincter'.  x factor the show is basically the karioke version of singing a popular song in front of judges.  its completely different from american idol because...  people thought american idol wouldnt survive without simon cowell, but it seems to be doing ok without him.  not everyone is a fan of the x-factor show.  this is true: elton john said that he would rather have his penis bitten off by a german shepherd than watch the x-factor.  i'm not making that up, he actually said that! and i'm thinking 'elton, you dont have to choose one or the other, you can do both!'  i've got a german shepherd that will do it and a jack russell that will nibble your balls at the same time!'
- james spader
- juno temple

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