7-25-13

+ 'its not such a great day here in l.a.', criag ferguson admits, 'according to the authorities we are on plague watch!  the department of health in los angeles confirmed there has been at least one case of bubonic plague here in l.a.!  the first victim has been identified: a squirrel!  the plague infected squirrel was found in the angeles national forest.  i hope the plague doesn't spread out.  if it wipes out squirrels all around the country, what's honey boo boo going to have for dinner?!?  they say people going camping in l.a. are in most danger.  you should be ok if you don't touch the dead animals.  i'm like, that's the only reason i go camping!  also, camping in l.a.?  are you serious?  anyway, i have been camping in l.a., it was terrifying!  i woke up outside my tent and saw a hairy creature rooting through the garbage.  it took all my courage just to whisper 'khloe kardashian, is that you?'.'
- bill hader
- shohreh aghdashloo

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