+ 'it is a great day for pope denedict XVI', craig ferguson states, 'or should i say former pope benedict XVI, he's officially retired.  today he said goodbye, i heard that before he left he loaded up his giant hat with staplers and post-its...  i'm kidding!  its a joke!  he's the pope, he would never steal anything!  he actually had to turn in his giant hat, they retired it at the vatican, its up there in the rafters right next to gretsky's 99.  apparently there is some tension at the vatican because the pope wouldnt give him back his security deposit. there was some trouble because there was some glue on the wall from his def leopard posters.  no, the pope is german so he actually listens to david hasselhoff and kraftwork!  i've said this before and i do mean it, we shouldnt worry about the pope's retirement, when one pope leaves, another one always popes up!'
- david duchovny
- ashley madekwe

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